..a hideous dream...(and Sigma Six rant!)

[Darkest Angel]

...I don't remember the details, but it involved my being forced to interact with inordinately unattractive people...

*looks around*

...oh.

*cough*

So...anybody buy any toys lately? I'm afraid I feel like quite the traitor...I've bought several of those GI Joe Sigma Six figures. Although my heart will always belong to the 3.75 inch line, I have to admit that these guys are pretty cool. A bit of a throwback, actually, to those halycon days of the sixties and seventies when some of you had hair and dinosaurs roamed the earth...

...but I digress.

They have the nifty packaging that has already been covered all over the interweb, with the endcaps that snap together to form a weapons case, and gobs and gobs of accessories. I mean, tons of shit. Some of these guys literally come with enough weapons and whatnot to arm two or even three figures. On top of that, several of 'em come with some mixed-mercantile accessories, like cloth pants, elastic harnesses (with tiny plastic clippy things!), etc. My personal favorite figure, Long Range, comes with a cloth trench, which Hasbro made in a nice OD Green, thus dodging the Matrix Rip-Off bullet by a hair.

--hey! I didn't mean for that last bit to be ironic and deep, but it is! Damn, I am good!

There's a pretty stable "style" happening with the Joes, whereby they are all wearing a fairly standard jumpsuit in black with individually colored highlights. There are a few minor differences, such as sleeve length and style, boots, etc., but uniformity is the general rule. Kinda cool, since Joe is supposed to be part of the military, after all (still, I don't think Long Range's ponyknob or Spirit's shag are quite up to current Armed Forces regulations). At a glance, it looks like Hasbro is recycling body parts, but that is not the case--each release so far has his own unique body; they just happen to be sculpted in basically the same outfit. There are even height and build differences that can be easily seen when the figures stand side by side. Articulation is good, with modified-ball joint shoulders, elbows, wrists, hips, knees and ankles, as well as limited ball joint heads, hinged torsos and cut waists--as a rule. There are a few plusses and minuses to that list, depending on the individual figure--Cobra Commander has no torso hinge due to a (lame) action feature.

So, cool.

...but.

Damn the but.

On the articulation front...things are just kinda weird. They are using a system that is more commonly seen in 12" scale figures, with no actual cut joints in the arms or legs. They instead rely on pegged, semi-ball joints. Example: A given figure's foot will have a simple, round-edged hinge at the top of the ankle. Protruding from the central part of the hinge is a peg, which inserts into the leg, thus forming a semi-ball joint--it can spin on the peg, or bend at the hinge, but cannot move in some directions, such as side to side, at all (at least, not without turning the foot and making the poor figure look like a gimp). This is how the ankles, knees, wrists and elbows of all these figures are made.

Which brings us to the overall sculpt...not bad...but lacking any real refinement, if you get my meaning. Most all of them have excellent faces, but little things like their holster hips and chunks of armor clinging mysteriously to bare flesh leave something to be desired.

Then there's the decos. The paint is both limited and sloppy. And I mean painted by spastic blind kids sloppy. Its not every figure, but its a lot of 'em, and with the carded figures costing $10 a pop, and the weapons case-packaged guys coming in at $15, its really not excusable.

Finally, the marketing...the line barely debuted in September, and as of today, you can purchase no less than three Snake Eyes variants, and two versions each of Duke and Storm Shadow. Third versions of Duke and Storm Shadow are in the next wave, along with a second Heavy Duty. Meanwhile, Long Range and Heavy Duty both have confirmed running change variants on the market. All this while we have only two named villains (and a generic BAT) and no females at all (rumour has it there may never be any females because Hasbro is afraid to market "dolls"). These are bordering on Mattel-like numbers, and I don't like it one damn bit.

Still...they are pretty cool, overall...in their own way.

Anybody else have any thoughts? Anybody here still actually buy toys?

[Andyman]

And you are?

[DemonsAngel]

where's the DA we all know and love [img]graemlins/cry_smile.gif[/img]
*chugs vodka all alone* [img]wink.gif[/img]

[Darkest Angel]

...I'm so fucking glad I wrote all that for two goddamned, three-fucking-line replies that don't relate to it in any manner whatsofuckingever.

Howzat for DA-style?

[DemonsAngel]

[img]eek.gif[/img] *sniff sniff* but but no andyman smishing *falls to the floor in tears* [img]tongue.gif[/img]

[Andyman]

Does G.I. Joe have any robots? [img]wink.gif[/img]

[Darkest Angel]

*snags vodka whilst Mort is busy with crying jag*

Fluff...yes.

*smish!*

[Andyman]

BTW-did you get some free time at work today?

[img]graemlins/hmmm.gif[/img] Or did you figure out a way to get a message out undetected?

[img]rolleyes.gif[/img] You're sending out a message via a phase harmonic tetrionic field thru the bypass plasma coil inducers, aren't you? Brilliant!

[Darkest Angel]

...um...the third one. Yeah.

...or, possibly, I just didn't go to work today.

One of those.

[Evil Temptation]

I've been wanting to get these... but just wasn't sure about it.

However, now that is has your seal of approval, I guess there really is no other choice.